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| For more information read Awaken the Giant Within, by Anthony Robbins (1991) "Chapter 8 Questions are the Answer." |
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When things go well in your life it's somewhat easy to feel empowered about your desired future. However, when things go wrong, when you're frustrated, when there are seemingly insurmountable problems, the mental state of empowerment is difficult to achieve.
Consider the principal who had a particularly rough day at school. The following morning she reported that she awoke asking herself a barrage of questions: "Do I have to go to work? What kind of stuff is going to be dumped on me today? Why did I take this job anyway?"
What's wrong with these questions? Nothing if you really want to hear the answers to them. Understand that your brain will always provide answers to the questions you ask. Also understand that inherent in the questions you ask are presuppositions that shape our perceptions. For example, when asking the question, "What kind of stuff will be dumped on me today?" the principal presupposes that she WILL be "dumped" upon. Imagine what she's thinking when the superintendent requests her help on a plan for their next district inservice day!
The questions we ask ourselves can be either empowering or disempowering. In learning about how the brain works, we know that the brain can't focus on everything at once, and, therefore, actively looks for things to NOT pay attention to. Questions help the brain delete information. If you're asking "Why am I so miserable?" you're giving your brain permission to delete all the reasons you should be feeling great! What if my friend asked different questions in the morning such as "How might I best use my talents and skills today?" or "What am I enjoying most in my job right now?" How might these questions provide this principal with a positive mental state as she walks into her office? How might it change her perception of the superintendent's request to help with the inservice plan? It's important to remember that it is not only the questions you ask, but the questions you fail to ask that can shape your desired future.
Learning to ask empowering questions is a critical skill for leaders. Questions can immediately change what we're focusing on and therefore, can change the way we feel and our state of mind. As a leader, it's important for you to stay in resourceful states of mind. The challenge is that most of us are on automatic pilot and do not consciously control the habitual questions we ask. The solution? Begin by asking yourself a few questions right now, "What questions am I asking myself? If I don't control these habitual questions, what might it cost me?" and "How might my life be improved if I began controlling the questions I ask myself right now?"
A helpful resource for creating a set of better questions: Awaken the Giant Within, by Anthony Robbins (1991) "Chapter 8 Questions are the Answer." |
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